Your Mom

Last year, I did a survey about Mother's Day.  There were two questions: 1) Do you like Mother's Day? and 2) Why?  Twenty-five people answered my survey, and about 1/3 of people said they did not like Mother's Day, and two people said they were indifferent.  I wanted to share a few insights from that survey.  All answers were anonymous, so I don't even know who wrote what.

Disliking Mother's Day

• "I have a terrible relationship with my mother."

• "My mother passed away when I was six. The day represents loss for me."

• "I feel it's a mockery when my mom is dead, and my stepmom is manipulative and doesn't give a damn about us."

• "Everyone gets so caught up trying to value motherhood as a universal truth for all women. Not everyone will be a mom or wants to be a mom. For that group of women, mother's day sucks."

• "Because I miss my mom. A lot. And the constant reminders that she isn't there kinda really hurt."

• "It makes me sad and feel insecure as a Mother"

Liking Mother's Day

• "It's the day we're encouraged to celebrate the people who are so often the invisible foundations of our lives."

• "My mom is one of my favorite people on this Earth. I appreciate any day that I can shower her with some of the love and presents she deserves."

• "People don't often show appreciation for their mothers and take them for granted."

• "Because moms are the best"

• "Because motherhood is something unique. When you become a mom your world is not the same and you no longer belong to yourself."

• "Motherhood is so selfless and too many people look over how important it is. Even for those who do not have good biological examples of motherhood, there are so many women who help mother us and should also be honored and recognized for that."

Take it as you will.  There was only one thing that I wanted to address that was brought up among someone who likes Mother's Day.  They said that people who have lost children make Mother's Day feel less special when they also want to be celebrated.  I whole-heartedly disagree with this.  If a mother has lost a child, that does not take away any of the work that that mother has given.  That does not erase the fact that she is a mother.

With all that said, I feel that I have grown quite a bit since last Mother's Day.  Last year, I believed that my mother hated me.  And so I had very hard feelings toward my mother last year.  And because she is gone, I cannot ask her.  This year, I don't believe she hated me.  I believe that I was a rough child to have, but I don't think she hated me.  I think as we live life, there are just things that we have to learn and that we eventually can overcome through time and help.  I still am not the greatest fan of Mother's Day, but I'm not as depressed about it this year as I was last year.  I'm still going to have to grow more to be okay with Mother's Day.

I appreciate everyone's honest answers.  I hope you are all doing well.