Becoming the Ward Joke
I moved into the ward last August. I was working every Sunday on an alternating morning/evening shift schedule. Therefore, I was a term used in the church known as "less active." This itself became a joke. I don't know why; it just did. The people that I would do stuff with would joke about me being less active. I think it had to do with the fact that I went to church when I could and actively brought up gospel topics. It probably didn't help that I joked right along with them. I had friends who would always joke that they invited me to game nights so I would be active again.
Come January, things really got weird. My friends said that they were going to find someone for me to start dating. This is the phrase used a lot by all the creepers who go to church: "Flirt to convert." (My friends are creepers.) I went on a few dates with some boys in the ward. Surprise!--I've been on dates. This is where a little fact about my ward comes in handy: everyone knows everything about everyone else. Except me. I tend to be a little behind and find out what happened about three months later. But that's another story. Just joking, it's not, I just don't talk to people. Everyone knows everything about me though. That's when my friends said that I really was converting from flirting. (I actually just was able to go to church more because I changed jobs.) So, I stopped going to church.
Actually, I didn't stop going to church. I just took a much needed break from dating. I don't know how some of those weird Mormon kids go on a date each week. Dating stresses me out. It's scary. Anyway, I thus started my reputation as a heart breaker. I don't think I actually broke anyone's heart, but it's now one of the jokes about me that some of my ward friends have. So, I am now the less active that breaks hearts but needs someone to "flirt to convert" me. I am a joke. But, that's not it. The next one is the true joke. It's also the best.
In June, my ward had a kickball tournament. I asked a group of people to be on my team. I hadn't set a team name, so I just signed myself up as Cami's team. Unbeknownst to me, the other people in my group signed up with Cami's team and Team Cami. Therefore, my team was just Team Cami. My team members said that we needed shirts and catch phrases. They started calling me Coach Cam.
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| Missing 5/8 of the team, but we got some representation |
We ended up winning the tournament because of my excellent coaching skills. Actually, we were the only team that showed up to the finals. We only played one game that month, and we lost it. Good times. At least you could say my team was dedicated. They came to all the games and all the practices.
The next month, my ward started a tennis tournament--doubles. So, we had team names again. Some of my kickball teammates named their teams after me. There was a Team Cami and The OG Team Cami. I was on neither of these teams. My teammate and I named our team after my teammate. I got texts to come play tennis when people didn't look at the players on the team. They just saw my name and thought I was on the team. This is what my sister meant about me being the ward joke.
Perpetuating the Ward Joke
Once upon a time, there was this really indecisive girl who made bad decisions. She decided to move back to Arizona after finishing her undergraduate degree. She told everyone she was moving. She thought that if she told everyone and made plans to do so and applied to a bunch of jobs, it would happen. So, she left. After many weeks of thinking and debating with herself, she decided while she was gone that she was maybe better off in Utah. At least for a little while. So, some weird stuff happened, blah blah, something else happened. Anyway, when she got back, the first person to see her moving in was her nemesis. And he had to make it known to the entire ward that she was back. The girl did grieve.
As of now, that girl still hasn't been to that ward for a month. Is she really still in that ward? Stay tuned to find out.
